Thursday, November 21, 2013
DRESS FOR SUCCESS by Joseph Conklin
Dear Stupid Ass Questions: I’m on unemployment and in order to get my check I have to go down to the unemployment office & apply for jobs or they stop sending my check. Should I dress for success or walk in with my burlap sack?
Dear Stupid Ass Questioner:
Always dress for success. Always. Fool them into believing that the only thing you want in this world is successfully being employed. Then, when they are at their highest expectations of you and have their guard lowered by your appearance thats when you fail them miserably. No matter how hard they try to get you employed, screw it up. They'll blame themselves out of pure sympathy for your lethargy masquerading as occupational retardation and continue sending you your check so you don't have to wear that burlap sack.