Monday, April 15, 2013

TEA PARTY by Kenny Colgin

KENNY COLGIN

Dear Stupid Ass Questions: I am having friends over for dinner and want it to look like I spent a lot of money on the beverages. I think that Snapple, would be a good choice but they are too expensive to waste on guests. Would it work if I used my Snapple empties and filled them with a generic powdered mix? I figured I could put clear tape around the top and make it look like they are still sealed.

Size DOES matter so click picture to enlarge

Kenny: Ya' know, I don't baffle easily. But once in a while I have been known to waffle. Your question waffled me and I ran straight to our wonderful team (and typically reliable), of culinary and manners experts at Stupid Ass Questions.They all laughed at me. ("You're the wonder boy! Figure this one out by yourself!") Soo, what ? Are you like 5 years old? Having a little tea party on Mom and Pops dime? No, it is not acceptable to empty a Snapple bottle and refill it with anything else. Hey, Ma and Pa are footing the bill. Make them splurge for the big ticket items! You know, like phoney baloney, laffy taffy, all the crap you kids love. On the odd chance, you are an adult with this question/quandry. Oh my!! P.S., my office mates here at Stupid Ass Questions just dropped off an invitation from you for dinner next weekend. They forged my signature. I did not sign it. I don't drink Snapple or ingest, phoney baloney, either. (Enjoy the tea party. Tell Alice I said hey.) 

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