Monday, June 18, 2012

IT'S IN THE WATER by Thomas J. Bellezza

Dear Stupid Ass Questions: I noticed that a lot of my friends are having babies. I've heard the saying "Somethings in the water". So my question is, is that tap water or bottled water? Since I’m not ready for children should I stop drinking water completely just to be sure?

Size does matter... so click on picture to enlarge

THOMAS: To be honest, yes, you should stop drinking water. Believe it or not this will not only help you, but will help us the population of planet Earth. How you ask... Well, if you stop drinking water you will most likely dehydrate and that will keep you from procreating, which in turn would ensure your line stops with you. And to answer your question, that's bottled water.

1 comment:

Aner Candelario said...

Answer: It's the Holy water that gets folks pregnant. You see the church is always looking to replenish it's stock of innocent and vulnerable youths for their intern program. Avoid it at all costs, and while you're at it I would avoid shaking the priest's hand too. Just in case. Oh and by all means don't drink the communion wine, or eat the wafer. It's a trap, and you will awaken greased up and belly down.