Monday, October 17, 2011
Dear Stupid Ass Questions: My best friend let me use her car. Well, after being out at my local bar I accidentally hit a phone pole. She would be so mad if she knew I went out that night and got drunk without her. Would it be ok if I ditched it somewhere and said it was stolen?
BARB: Great question. Ditch the crappy car in your local junkyard, then dump your dopey friend. She says you can’t drink and drive without her? Who does she think she is - Lindsay Lo? Sounds way too clingy! You may be cultivating a stalker in that sicko relationship. BTW, aren’t you thrilled you’re not a celebrity and didn’t get your very stupid ass arrested and your skeezy mug shot splashed all over TMZ for the entire world to enjoy? Friends don’t let friends be stupid asses – unless, of course, they are, too.
For your amusement, watch “Smile!” and weep!