Tuesday, June 18, 2013
5 YEAR ITCH by Sean Cirone
Dear Stupid Ass Questions & Sean, My 5 year wedding anniversary is coming up in a few weeks and I just found out my husband is cheating on me with my best friend. I was wondering what you think would be a good gift. Isn’t five years traditionally wood?
SEAN: A little known fact is that the apple tree consists of wood, apples fruit from this tree made of wood and the seeds contained within in the apples which fruit from the tree which is in turn made of wood are one of the base components in cyanide. Make sure you wrap this present.
IF all else fails remember that most times a sturdy ax is accompanied by a handle made of wood.