Friday, July 5, 2013
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT by Gisele Noel
Dear Stupid Ass Questions, Why is it every time I fly on an airplane these days, I wind up seated next to a beautiful woman from another country, but I can't hit on her because she doesn’t understand what I'm saying? Doesn't anybody speak, "plane English" anymore? That and I thought certain hand gestures were supposed to be universal?
Dear Donald Trump, Let me put this plainly, unless you’re seated next to Miss. Utah & she’s creating FAA education better, there is no such thing as plane English. But it sounds like you may not be using the right hand gestures. With your hair & marital status, your best bet to close the deal is to put your thumb & middle finger together & then hold them up to your mouth as you squint & inhale deeply. If that doesn’t work, try showing them your name on the Forbes List of billionaires.